I am way behind because of an intense work load. I’ll do my best to catch up this week with two posts a day. One in the morning, one in the evening. Thanks!
Dear Little One (You’ll always be little compared to me),
Hi, it’s your old dad again. I love you. I hope you are having a fantastic day today, whenever this day is.
Are you sick of all my “Dad jokes” yet? Actually, don’t answer that… because I will just go on assuming that you love them all!!
I started practicing my “dad jokes” when I found out your mom was pregnant with you. What is a dad joke? It’s a joke that is painfully lame, ridiculously obvious, and just overall bad.
Example; We are all eating dinner at the kitchen table, and the vegetable of the evening is peas. While eating, I accidently spill some peas on the table. You look at the fallen peas, and then me. I look at you with embarrassment, and say; “Sorry… I just pead all over the table.”
Then you role your eyes and say, “Daaaaadd!”
Oh how I love dad jokes!
You’ve probably already heard my favorite “Childish” joke. You need to be over 12 to read this one. I want it to be immortalized in these letters, so that you can cherish it forever. FOREVER!!!!
My favorite joke: A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender immediately notices him and takes in the utterly strange appearance. It’s not every day the bartender sees a pirate – actually he never has seen a pirate—so he notices everything from his wiry beard laced with gray strains. His leather for skin, with a black eye patch. The pirate limps towards the bar with his wooden peg for a leg. His clothes are tattered and bleached from the sun. A parrot sits upon the pirates left shoulder. The closer the pirate gets to the bar, the stronger the smell of rum becomes. Just as the pirate is reaching the bar, the bewildered bartender notices something extremely odd.
“Arggh, I’d like me some rum.” The pirate grunts.
The bartender grabs a glass, and starts pouring some rum. “Sure… I’ve got to ask you… why do you have a steering-wheel attached to your crotch?” He asks while passing the rum to the salty pirate.
The pirate downs the rum in one big gulp, and eyes the bartender with his one good eye. He leans in close and says; “ARRRGGGHH, It’s Driving ME NUTS!”
Hahaha. It gets me every time. Writing it out was even more fun than telling it. The details may change over time, but the punch line is always the same. Oh Win-win, you’ll hear plenty of terribly lame jokes come from my mouth. I joke too often. I’m pretty sure that I am always trying to make a joke, and only 40% are funny (if that). So, please accept my sincerest of apologies.
Actually, no… I won’t apologize. Dad jokes are one of those things that as a parent I get the privilege of annoying you with. It goes right along with dressing like a dork, and embarrassing you in public.
It’s important to joke. It’s even more important to laugh.
Life is too hard and too serious far too often. While this is true, it is also true that you can always have fun if you allow yourself to have fun. Jokes and making people laugh is one of the ways I have fun. I love making your mother laugh. She’s so cute when she laughs. She has so many fake laughs in her habitual attempt to not hurt my feelings at the 60% of bad jokes I tell. Her real giggles are great, but her REAL laugh, the uncontrollable semi-awkward loud laugh is a sound I live for. It makes me smile and feel a whole lot of joy!
Your little giggles are so cute right now. Every time I tell you that I love you, you give me a shy giggle, which is accompanied with a huge grin. It warms my heart so much. I love your laugh too. I hope to always make you laugh. Your happiness is one of the warmest feelings my heart can feel. I truly look forward to hearing all the different laughs you develop as you grow older.
So, when you are sad, allow yourself to find humor where there is little.
When you are angry, seek laughter and smiles to escape that spike in anger.
When you are happy, laughter, jokes, and smiles will only make you happier.
At times, you will want to make jokes at another’s expense, but that is not a joke… that’s just being mean.
I seriously cannot wait to joke around with you. I hope your days are filled with laughter, and I look forward to our time of laughing so hard our stomachs hurt. You’re one of my great joys in my life, and that’s no joke, that is truth. I love you!!